Man in the Mirror

For a long time now, I've been unhappy. I think the core of it started in over 10 years ago. I was in a great place mentally and physically. Perhaps it was the vigor of youth and the hope of a younger man (I'm not *that* old really...).

I think I took a couple of really wrong turns, made some poor decisions, and rushed when I should have lingered. Who hasn't as a young adult? I was chasing money and happiness and mad with the possibilities. A million of them dancing in front of me and me... with a mountain of perceived wisdom, when in fact it was a modest amount and maybe not enough to have sufficed.

I am asking myself why I started writing this right now. Well, there are three really strong reasons:

1. I realize that I have been very sad and down about things. I need to find my joy. At the moment, I live in a house of unjoy. It's a life out of uncertainty even in myself and I need to write and sing and dance my way out of this time.
   
2. I find myself with profound thoughts and they spill out of my heart and head at times unbidden. A day later, they are gone and I am reduced to remembering only that I had some important thought that I can't quite remember. I'd like to preserve some of this wisdom, for those times I become unwise.
   
3. I had... a... vision about a week ago. I am not going to explain it here but it involves me and a choice I made years ago. The results of that choice still haunts me. I need to correct the wrongs of my past self to move forward.

Okay, that last item was a little secretive but what good tale doesn't have a little suspense?